Connection is Everything – Building a Culture of Connectedness Part 2 of 2
In Part 1, we discussed the critical importance of nurturing relationships, both inside and outside a school, to support student growth. We learned about the “Make it Right” formula for restoring relationships that don’t work or don’t work as well as one would like. And we considered the importance of role modeling so students learn how to restore relationships and move forward.
What is the one critical thing we need to do before problem solving with someone? We must lower the emotions before we can start problem solving. Here is a strategy that will do just that.
Through Your Lenses:
Perspective training allows people to understand and reflect back someone’s emotional state so they feel heard and understood. With the exercise “Through Your Lenses,” participants learn how to respond rather than react. When one can genuinely see a situation from another point of view and express that through language, the emotional temperature in the listener drops. Then a space is created for the speaker to state his/her point of view. From there solutions can be created.
For example, when an upset teacher approaches another teacher with a problem they want solved, the listener needs to view the request through the lens of the upset person and reflect back what they hear, their concern and/or their commitment, until they feel understood and calm down. That creates a space for the listener/reflector to communicate their point of view. Only then can problem solving begin.
Just like in a very hot classroom at a point where the teacher and students can’t think anymore because of the heat, when the emotional temperature is too high, people can’t problem solve. When people are emotionally upset the thinking part of the brain, the frontal cortex, is out of commission. This is because the survival part of the brain, the amygdala, is in full gear. Bring the emotional temperature down first, then seek to solve the problem.
Nurture the soil (relationships) at your school. Make the soil rich for raising strong, healthy students so they can reach their potential and soar!
If you are interested in learning simple but radical ways to restore relationships and bring down emotional states, as well as an approach to teach your students essential social and emotional skills, email or call us today. Let’s see if a workshop is right for your staff or for your students.
Transform your school with a couple of simple but powerful social/emotional strategies! Email: email@example.com or call 647 881-6958.