Communicating Empathy is Essential?
Can your students communicate their ideas clearly and succinctly after raising their hands?
When students have the opportunity to defend their point of view or articulate their ideas more fully, I often become aware of their inability to communicate. Even with ample “wait time,” they stammer, can’t find the words or don’t express their ideas in full. The listener is left guessing at the meaning and several exchanges are needed to clarify rather simple thoughts.
In my work with students and teachers in a plethora of classes and in different geographical areas, I realize that we as adults are in the habit of eliciting one or two-word responses from children. This is not adequate time to formulate and communicate ideas in the developing child.
Could it be that the lack of students’ ability to write is because they are not required to articulate their thoughts verbally? When we do a good job developing speaking skills in young students, writing is easier for them. Clear communication and formulating thoughts begin with listening and speaking. Here is an example of bringing out student voice inside a unit of work.
Communication is multi-layered. We know body language, choice of words, tone and eye contact are important skills in communication. Our students need explicit instruction in communication to develop their skills.
As well, we must teach how to communicate empathy, perspective and an understanding of the unspoken, but present. For example, mirroring back what was said in conversation, such as the speaker’s concern or commitment.
Example 1:
A has their hat taken by B.
A “Hey, give me back my hat!”
OR
A has their hat taken by B.
A “So you want to play catch, do you?” (reflecting back the commitment of A)
Example 2:
A asks, “Can I be in your group?”
B responds, “No way!”
OR
A asks, “Can I be in your group?”
B responds, “I know you want to be in this group. It is full right now, but another time.”
Communicating empathy, perspective and an understanding of the unspoken but present results in a much stronger and more positive outcome. And, we must teach our students to think about the outcome they desire before they are in a situation that can trigger them. Once in the situation, they are in reaction mode (the amygdala centre of the brain is engaged) and it is impossible to access a new idea (which requires the engagement of the frontal cortex).
Thinking about one’s desired outcome must be done in advance of a real-life situation. So, pro-active teaching of social and emotional skills would allow students to consider their desired outcomes. Then role-playing their responses in typical scenarios, such as the examples above, would allow rehearsal time. This type of practice, with side-coaching by the teacher, allows students to respond rather than react in a real situation. Practice makes permanent so rehearsing responses are critical for access when triggered.
Practicing social and emotional skills includes self-awareness (recognizing and labelling the emotions,) managing emotions and interacting with others in ways that work. When students are given explicit teaching and rehearsal time with these skills, they will be able to tell stories and experiences expressively, which is what we look for in their writing.
Reading, Writing, Math, are foundational for academic education. Essential Skills include developing quality communication skills in our students.